Empathy
Feel what others feel. See through their eyes.
What It Is
The ability to understand another person's experience from the inside — not just intellectually, but felt. To know what the world looks like from where they stand.
Why It Matters
People don't care what you know until they know that you care. Empathy builds trust. Trust enables everything else.
| Without Empathy | With Empathy |
|---|---|
| Solve wrong problems | Solve felt problems |
| Persuade through logic only | Connect then persuade |
| Manage people | Lead people |
| Build features | Build what matters |
Core Patterns
- Perspective-taking — What are they optimising for?
- Emotional attunement — What are they feeling, not just saying?
- Context awareness — What pressures are they under?
- Withhold judgment — Understand before you evaluate
- Mirror, don't fix — Sometimes being heard is enough
How to Develop
- Listen without planning your response
- Ask about their experience, not their opinions
- Notice body language and tone
- Imagine their constraints — what would you do in their position?
- Read fiction — it builds empathy muscles
The Shadow
Enmeshment. Absorbing others' emotions. Losing yourself in their experience. Using empathy to manipulate.
Archetype Connection
Primary: Coach — uses empathy to unlock potential Secondary: Dreamer — understands what people want to become